Sunday, April 28, 2013


A law school dropout, now director of a theater department smiled and spoke about truth. The only thing he said mattered was truth. 

Yet, where is truth when it feels as if society drags us constantly from it? Where so many people hide behind the mask of some rationalization, truth is a lost concept. Some hide behind advanced degrees, never wanting the world to know their own intellectual impotency. Some, outwardly beautiful people, will forever feel insecure in their beauty. Their worth ebbs and flows on the extrinsic energy of the group. 

However, inner confidence gives rise to a classic comfort. This comfort gives rise to a classic, key emotional stability that helps us stay as a steady as a clock when all the world storms around us. As Robert Louis Stevenson once wrote, "Quiet minds cannot be perplexed or frightened, but go on in fortune or misfortune at their own private pace, like a clock during a thunder-storm." 

I have watched my confidence dwindle this year. I wrapped it up in another, and another, and another until it was out of my control - a stormy mind in a stormy world. Yet, today, I take a step back as my mind begins to quiet, as I start to see the world again for how it is. 

Being strong in this world means carrying a quiet mind through the raging storm

Camus once declared that within the midst of the winter, he found within him an invincible summer.This summer, my invincible summer, my personal fire, I have thrown in many directions lately. I have spread it out over 2,000 miles and felt only empty words in return. I have spent what little energy I had in a fruitless endeavor. My body crashed against the shore of lost hope. It is a hard thing for me to know something is possible, but a realistic impossibility. As with everything, this is a learning experience. 



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Ambitiously enduring.