Wednesday, June 14, 2006


I laid down my head in the soft green grass and shifted my eyes from puffy white clouds to mighty green mountains. I knew I was home.

I told Erinn that I never really remember what the mountains mean to me until I am back. I have no idea how much I repress until I am here. I just know when I am here, I finally feel a sense of calm coming into my life. I can breathe.

I also get a sense of humor from my family out here. They are always so lighthearted and joyous, especially in the face of something sad. I have found great strength in such optimism.

That was the only first day. I had two hours worth of sleep at a rest stop two miles from the Colorado border. I had nearly hit a couple deer when I decided dying before getting to Colorado just wasn't in the big picture. So I pulled into a rest stop and snoozed until I couldn't stand the excitement anymore.

Today is a new day. It will give me time to think. I have to think of how I will fully accept Southern Illinois for another year. I am looking for an omen, a refreshing way of thought or a little bit of inspiration.

I believe I will find all.

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Ambitiously enduring.